Better

You expect me to claim “BETTER” after all I’ve been through?

You want me to overlook the hurt and the pain of several years?
Huh! You say “let it go and move on”
Do you understand where I come from?
I’m not talking about a snubbed toe or a dirty look
I’m talking about guns being shot at me and being hit with a right hook
I’m talking about rejection from friends and family alike
Boyfriends cheating and staying out all night
I’m speaking of experiencing death of several loved ones
My mom included
And you say "don’t be bitter?!"
Tell me how? Show me the better you speak of
Because I’m looking at church people who have lied on me
And all the while shouting and speaking in tongues
I’m dealing with losing jobs and not being able to pay the bills
All while trusting in you and trying to be still
Bitterness has become my very best friend
And you say “Better”, so my problems to you I lend
I will give to you my hurts, my pain, and my shame
I will lay at the altar those things I wish to gain
You say look to the hills from where I will find help
You tell me not to look back, but to focus on my next step
All the things that have happened to me in my past
You say are gone away, because I am now made new
So I release the people who have offended me
And I forgive those who have caused me hurt
I stand before you broken, stripped, and naked
And I say, “Lord, do the work”
I will not move from your presence
Nor from the altar will I leave
I will stay on the Potter’s wheel
Until you, God, are done with me
I renounce my allegiance to bitterness
And I walk in love and forgiveness
You have for me a hope and a future
So, I will no longer be bitter, but Better